Monday, May 7, 2012

The great banana peel incident

 I'm super tolerant of people, and where I live the bicyclists zoom by as they head up for some serious hill training. I'm tolerant of them moving to the front of the line at a stop light. I'm tolerant of them getting on the sidewalk when it is faster than waiting at a light. I'm tolerant of them breaking all the road rules and then demanding I treat them like a vehicle even if they don't pay a registration fee. It's a public street, they have as much right to use it as I do, they should just follow the rules.
It takes 2 years or more for this to become one with the earth.

I was getting ready to pull into the driveway on Saturday so I didn't pass the 2 cyclists who were all over the road and not staying in the bike lane. I was tolerant and was patient for 1/4 mile as I approached home. Suddenly one of them threw a banana peel and it landed in the middle of my driveway. I stopped the car in front of my house and just stared at the banana peel for a minute, debating what to do. This was my driveway, not a trash can, and I shouldn't be expected to clean up after some moron who carried the banana in his pocket but didn't want the peel in there. Emotion got the best of me, I can only handle so much idiocy at a time so I picked up the banana peel and drove down the road looking for the bike. Several miles away I found them and instead of just tossing it out the window at the guy , I drove up the road, pulled over and got out with said banana peel in my hand. When they got close I said, "I would appreciate it if you wouldn't throw your trash in my driveway." The cyclists looked stunned and the peel tosser mumbled "sorry" but kept going, so I threw the peel in the bike lane and got back in my car.

This is where I figured it would be over, a cyclist called out for being a douche, and me heading home. I figured wrong, the cyclists turn around and ride up to my car, shaking from adrenaline and accusing me of throwing my trash at him. He was wrong, got called on it, but had to make a show in front of his buddy.

I politely told him since it's his trash, he needs to take care of it and not toss it in someones driveway. He got more irate (how dare someone point out the obvious), accusing me again of throwing my trash at him and how dare I leave it on the road in front of a school. I'm really confused at this point wondering what rules apply to banana peels, who's trash is it, school zones and cyclists. I told him it's his trash and to do the right thing, but he had told me he doesn't care where the peel ends up, it's biodegradable. 
Maybe I should have just stayed home and tossed the peel in the trash, maybe I should have taken the high road as always. Nope, not this time, once in a while I'm going to make a point that the rules apply to everyone even if they don't agree and even if that means I'm going to be confrontational.

"So if it's ok for you to toss your trash in my driveway, how about if I come to your house and take a big shit on your doorstep, it's biodegradable too you know!"

The cyclists had nothing to say and left, leaving his trash on the road (in front of a school, the ultimate trash dumping no-no!). I was the bad guy in this situation in his mind (and his buddies mind, who wouldn't shut up the entire time egging him on about how I threw my trash at them). I doubt they could remember what driveway they threw it in, and just in case they remembered my car and went looking for it, I went from the incident spot to work and got a completely different vehicle with a different color. They didn't get my license plate number since they never were behind me during the conversation (no front plate required) and I waited until they left before I turned around.

Tolerance doesn't mean I (or you) have to put up with or take crap from anyone. I'm not talking about what's fair, everyone has a limit and I hit mine. I can pretty much guarantee if I drove by his house with him standing there, and threw trash in his driveway that he would have been mad as hell. If it's wrong it's still wrong even if you think no one is looking and what you do when no one is looking says a lot about a persons character.

I changed the starter on one of my vehicles, got all the chores and housework done, got a few new magazines for one of my pistols at the gun show, picked up 500 rounds of ammo and canned 12 pounds of ground beef. I also opened some banana chips... and laughed when I did it.


  1. i couldn't agree with you more and jambaloney as a 35+yr cyclist would also agree! there are rules of the road that apply to everyone - cyclists included! and they break so many rules so much of the time that it gives all cyclists a bad name. i think that picking up the banana peel and going to find those idiots released some frustration for you. are they going to change their stupid ways? well, they might think twice about tossing their fruit peels willy-nilly in the's hoping!

    your friend,

    1. I just can't understand the nerve some people have, the entitlement to do whatever they please and then the balls they have when called out for these kind of actions.
      I still want to crap on his lawn.. :)